All The News That's Fit To Print

Christian ran upstairs, grabbed a pencil and a stack of paper, and then disappeared. Erika came up a bit later with a wide grin on her face and bragged "We're watching the news, just like you." Heather and I collectively thought "Oh great, now you can be as depressed as we are."

Heather went downstairs and saw mini-Woodward and mini-Bernstein engrossed in the day's headlines. Heather intervened and said "Hey, uh, you don't have to watch the news, watch some cartoons." Too late. Christian adjusted his hat, bit down a little harder on his cigar and mumbled "Not now, Ma. Gotta a deadline to meet."

Tomorrow I'm going to outfit our little Jimmy Olsen and Lois Lane with one of my old Polaroid cameras (the one with actual flash bulbs, yep, I've got one of those), a flip notebook, and a pencil sharpened down to its nub and put them on the most pressing issue of the day - who left the Hostess wrapper in our front yard.

Expired Polaroid Film

It's been a while since I pulled out my Polaroid 600SE. Remember it? That's the camera I got for a song because the eBay seller made the mistake of writing several lines about its damaged housing when what matters most is whether the lens (which contains the shutter) works. And it does. It's a wonderful camera but it's about the size and weight of a microwave oven. To make it work you have to perform a mental checklist which is about a long as the Space Shuttle's. The focus mechanism was probably state of the art when it was manufactured but if you use it long enough your sure to develop a stigmatism. The Polaroid film inside the camera expired in September 2009. I feared that its magical chemicals might have turned to dust. I focused, pulled the trigger, squeezed the chemicals through the camera's rollers, and presto. See the results below.

Instant Back for Lomo LCA

The blurry goodness of the LCA lens has finally converged with the squishy colors of instant film. Behold the instant back for the Loma LCA. Just don't behold too long or you'll strain your eyes.













You turn on the instant back and a blue LED lights up while the film slowly whirrs out. It uses Fuji's Mini Instax film. Nice film but a little small. Then comes the anticipation - what will develop? And will it be any good? It reminds me of the Polaroid I-Zone Pocket Camera which produced stamp size instant photos. Oh, you don't remember that camera? Neither does the rest of America. And that's why Polaroid went bankrupt.













Indulge me for a second while I take a little jag - who are the wizards who run Polaroid? Honestly, I think they are actual wizards with no business experience or sense of pop-culture. Wizards and their stupid pointy hats. I mean honestly, within the last 10 years the Lomographic company made horrible analog cameras hot despite the robotic rise of digital cameras. They carved a niche for themselves among hipsters and lazy photographic enthusiasts who refuse to read the manuals that came with with their cameras (I fall in the latter category). Now Lomographic is worth a bazillion dollars and Polaroid is . . . is uhm, not.













Meanwhile, I watched as Polaroid stopped making one specialty film after another as their fans wept loudly on the interblogs. Now Fuji owns the instant market. Polaroid is trying to make a comeback. But instead of making what people yearn for (instant film), the wizards have partnered with Lady GaGa to produce sunglasses with pictures in them. I guess the partnership makes perfect sense - whether you're looking at Lady GaGa or these new sunglasses you walk away scratching your head thinking "What was that?"

A Dandy Set List

Nearly forgot this.

A Dandy Week

I must have done something right lately because Heather let me see two, that's two Dandy Warhol concerts this week. Then again, she might of resigned herself to the fact that I was going one way or another. They tour so little. Well, they tour as much as any band but that's just not enough for me. I check their blog regularly waiting for the slightest hint that a new album or a new tour will be announced. And then I pounce. You know that guy who waits in line a couple days before tickets go on sale? Well, I'm that guy when the Dandys release anything.



















The top pic was taken at the Belly Up with the Hipstamatic app for the iPhone. The DEC 80 date is Hipstamatic's annoying inside joke for hipsters. "We've dated it 30 years before, cool, huh?" No, not cool. And there's no way to adjust the date - very not cool. Spencer joined me at the Belly Up and we had a good time talking family, work and surf. Bummer he doesn't live any closer to San Diego.

The second pic was taken at new Club Nokia near the Staples Center in Los Angeles. Another good venue, and as you can see, I scored a good spot near the stage again. Lee came along for the two hour show and the two hour drive home. LIvely conversation kept me from dozing off at 2:00 a.m.

I think that makes nine live Dandy shows I've seen. Maybe I'll go to their turf, Portland, for the tenth show.

Here's A Smile

After reading the blog entry below I thought it prudent to show that indeed Juliet can smile for a photo. Just make sure the stars are aligned before you press the shutter button. And act quickly. She's easily distracted.

Someone's Had Enough

I love this photo. Heather dressed the kids in white, dragged them to Ocean Beach, and tried to take a Christmas photo. No easy feat. And don't forget, the kids have to spend an hour in the tub after each jaunt to the beach. So a quick beach photo can easily turn into hours of work. But Heather pressed on. With the sun fading fast she knew she only had a minute or two of good light left before this beach photo turned into a night photo that could have been taken anywhere. Christian and Erika performed like the pros they are but young Juliet just wasn't up to the task. Should've studied her biorhythm charts a little longer I suppose because this was clearly not the time for Juliet to shine. Well, by the time this photo was snapped Juliet had been fussing and uncooperative for a solid five minutes. After trying every trick in the book Heather tried bribery. She pulled a piece of candy from her shirt pocket. But bribery only works against a calculating and corrupt foe. Juliet is neither calculating or corrupt. She's a two year old and when she wants it, she wants it now. She leapt from her sandy seat and made way to the candy. Snap! By the looks of it, Christian and Erika decided to check-out rather than add to the turmoil. Heather came back home, bathed the kids, and pieced together a montage of our smiling kids walking through the sand for our Christmas card. I only wish this picture would have been on the reverse side.